The cost of living in Australia- HOW MUCH??

"OK, so you want to go back to university - that's fine. But why Australia?" my Dad was asking, nearly two years ago. Inexplicably, the theme from Family Fortunes ran through my head as background music while I considered my choice of quick fire answers. Was it:

(a) "why not?" - the enigmatic reply

(b) "it's got better weather" - the chav answer

(c) "the laid back lifstyle" - largely based on the holiday I'd just come back from

(d) "the cost of living's cheaper" - the uninformed response

(e) "I need a change and I wanna spend more time with Dave" - the truth.

I opted for a combination of (c) and (d), and steered clear of (e) for more credibility. At that point a big Family Fortune "EH URR" (not there) warning noise should have gone off in my head: Like a lot of poms, I really did think living in oz for two years was going to be cheaper than blighty. Doh!

So it was with growing dismay that after arriving, all excited and optimistic, I soon found out the truth: Which is that with only a population of 21 million, Australia's consumer market is small so there aren't many companies competing for your attention. So they don't feel the need to bring their prices down. Ever.

The first rip off I encountered was shelling out $300 for a second hand bed. Back then this amounted to about £120. At my first opportunity of seeing it in proper daylight (after I'd paid for it of course), this bed revealed some very dodgy looking stains on the mattress. Ugghh! As soon as possible, this mattress was booted out into the street for the annual big rubbish collection so we could replace it with a new one. Which cost $1000 - approx £500. Interestingly, within half an hour of putting the old mattress out in the street, it was snapped up. Presumably by someone in a knackered old ute. Clearly we weren't the only ones feeling the pain of buying household essentials in Australia.

Books and DVDs are outrageously priced down in this part of the world, which hurts if you're a student trying to buy textbooks. On average I have had to pay about $120 (£60) per new book, which I have to buy three of for each of my four semesters. It's cheaper to buy them from Amazon UK and have them sent here. Recently, I have been using textbookexchange.com.au for buying and selling used books. This has saved me a lot of money but the prices of second hand books are still astronomical. It is possible to buy and sell the same book for the same price using this website however, so I guess it amounts to a free book.

And don't even get me started on banks. For the equivalent of a current account, you have to pay for the privilege (about $5 a month), you don't earn any interest, you will be charged for using another bank's ATM and charged for ordering a cheque book. There are one or two international banks, such as HSBC, who are now dipping their toe in the Australian market, hopefully about to bring some sanity into this financial world of con artists.

Other unexpected expensive surprises include broadband (ADSL2 only really available in the cities), healthcare (no NHS AND no paid maternity leave!), used cars (in Queensland where they last forever), shoes (unless you go to a shop smelling unnervingly of rubber), household furniture (unless you can get to one of five Ikeas in the whole of Australia - one in each state except NT and Tas) and ALL, and I mean ALL, appliances (see blog entry for Nov 2007).

It's not all bad though. Reasonable prices can be found in high street clothes shops. This is because the clothes are made in China and will shrink or fall apart in a wash temperature warmer than a penguin's arse (Australia has those too).

So, after all this whinging, I suppose the burning question is: Would I have abandoned going to Australia if I'd have been warned about all this beforehand? Would I have stayed in Blighty to attempt a change in career and life experiences??

"EH URR".

Late for coffee in beeyoodiful Noosa

Standing on the headland and looking at my watch, I knew I had to tear myself away from this idyllic spot. Just a couple more minutes, I told myself. Just enough time to see another couple of water spouts above the humpback whales who were languishing in the middle distance and didn't seem to be in a hurry to go anywhere. Unlike me right now.

It was a wrench but I knew that if I didn't get a move on I would be keeping Dave waiting at our favourite cafe along the Noosa River. We can never remember the name of it; we just call it the Elvis cafe because they have a statue of 'Him' outside on Gympie Terrace. From any table there's a great view of where the river meets the sea. At this time of year the sun has set by 5.30pm. I wanted to get there before sundown. It's the middle of winter now but I've just been standing on the edge of an ocean cliff wearing a T-shirt and sunglasses.

I took up a brisk pace, returning smiles or hellos to people I passed along the track through the National Park. It was quiet and peaceful. The koalas would be starting to wake up and venture down to the lower branches. I had already spotted one high up in a huge eucalyptus, looking down at me. Where else in the world could you see koalas, kangaroos and whales all in one day?

I rounded a corner into Tea Tree Bay to witness a magical Noosa moment. Shafts of golden sunlight broke through the clouds, bathing everything before me in a warm, honey glow. The beauty of my surroundings was intensified in that moment, serving to remind me yet again how lucky we are to live here. I marvelled at the cathedral of ancient white gum trees, the perfect sandy shore, the reflected sunlight in the molten water, the gentle warm breeze playing with my hair, the smell of sea, tea tree and eucalyptus all mixed in together.

I turned to go.

And was promptly knocked down by a long distance runner.

Cheers geezer.